Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Persona 4 vs Persona 3

OK, let me just say while I love both games, I'm lean to P4 more than P3. You see, I like a game that's somewhat upbeat. If you can make a game that involves catching a serial killer upbeat, you get my respect. Persona 4 is that game. It has memorable characters, effective game mechanics, one badass soundtrack, and an incredible plot.  You go to a small town and live with your uncle and cousin for a year while making friends at the local high school, all while exploring a dangerous world behind the TV screen
Now, let's compare it to Persona 3. Instead of finding a killer, you're saving the world, which is typical video game fare. You go to a boarding high school, hang out with people, and at night you explore a giant dangerous tower during a secret 25th hour. However, unlike Persona 4.....Persona 3 gets pretty grim. Suicidal imagery, lots and lots of deaths, not to mention the final boss is the representation of humanity's desire for death.....0_o. Like i said, Persona 3 is grim-dark as all get-out. I guess it's just me, but Persona 3 strikes an unnerving chord with me. I'm not going to spoil the ending, but said ending left me feeling pretty bummed. That doesn't change the fact that it's a good game, but it seems like the plot's mood never really gets out of the nihilistic are it squats around in. Persona 4, meanwhile, is a fairly cheerful game. Yeah, there's some downer moments, but they're outnumbered by the funny moments that range from a small chuckle to side-splitting and rolling in the aisles with laughter. Humor's a powerful thing, even more so than sadness. Some games, like Monkey Island, Portal, and Bulletstorm are best remembered by how many laughs they bring us, as well as their gameplay.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Monday, September 26, 2011

Music Review of Green Day

OK, let me just get this off my back: I FUCKING LOVE GREEN DAY. Now, with that said, let's talk history: it all started when a Big Bang- wait, sorry, too far back. Let me get back on topic: In 1987, friends Billie Joe Armstrong and Mike Dirnt, 15 years old at the time, formed a band called Sweet Children. Its first live performance took place on October 17, 1987 at Rod's Hickory Pit in  Vallejo, CA where Armstrong's mother was working. In 1988, Armstrong and Dirnt began working with Sean Hughes and the former Isocracy drummer Al Sobrante....actually, let's skip forward a little....
Green Day released two albums in 1988-1990, 39/Smooth and Kerplunk. However, in 1994, Green Day released the album that rocketed them to punk stardom, Dookie, whose quality CANNOT be described with the album title's linguistic cousin, shit. Dookie seemed to fall from heaven on a gilded chariot with the boozy "When I Come Around", the LSD-fueled bassline magnum opus "Longview", and the dearly beloved "Basket Case". This caused a bunch of knuckleheaded naysayers to cry "Bullshit! This isn't punk! GREEN DAY HAVE BECOME SELLOUTS!", which may have caused the band to go into an identity crisis similar to Nirvana and released Insomniac, which featured hits like "Brain Stew", "Geek Stink Breath", and "Walking Contradiction". Two albums later and Green Day dropped off the radar and into obsolescence.

Who knew an Idiot would save them?

In the summer of 2003, the band went into a studio to write and record new material for a new album, tentatively titled Cigarettes and Valentines. They recorded 20 songs for it, and one day they came in, only to discover- Whoop!- THE ENTIRE FUCKING ALBUM DISAPPEARED! The band decided not to re-record C&V, Green Day collaborated with Iggy Pop on two tracks for his album Skull Ring in November 2003. On February 1, 2004 a new song, a cover of "I Fought the Law" made its debut on a commercial for iTunes during NFL Super Bowl XXXVIII. The band underwent serious "band therapy", engaging in a number of long talks to work out the members' differences after accusations from Dirnt and Cool that Armstrong was "the band's Nazi", and other claims born from stress.
The resulting album, American Idiot (2004), debuted at number one on the Billboard charts, the band's first album to reach number one, backed by the success of the album's first single, "American Idiot". The album was labeled as a "punk rock opera" which follows the journey of the fictitious "Jesus of Suburbia".[32] American Idiot won the 2005 Grammy for "Best Rock Album" and the band swept the 2005 MTV music awards, winning a total of seven of the eight awards they were nominated for, including the Viewer's Choice Award.[33]
Through 2005, the band toured in support of the album with nearly 150 dates—the longest tour in its career—visiting Japan, Australia, South America and the United Kingdom. While touring for American Idiot, they filmed and recorded the two concerts at the Milton Keynes National Bowl in England, which was voted 'The Best Show On Earth' in a Kerrang! Magazine Poll. These recordings were released as a live CD and DVD called Bullet in a Bible on November 15, 2005. This CD/DVD featured songs from American Idiot as well as a songs from all its previous albums, except Kerplunk and 1,039/Smoothed Out Slappy Hours. The DVD featured behind-the-scenes footage of the band, and showed how the band prepared to put on the show. The final shows of its 2005 world tour were in Sydney, Australia, and Melbourne, Australia, on December 14 and 17 respectively. On January 10, 2006 the band was awarded with a People's Choice Award for favorite group.

Now, let me finish with my full opinion: These guys are my favorite band. In a world dominated with singers like Gaga, Perry, and that one high-pitched singing boy (may he burn in Hell while Lucifer cuts his tongue out) it's nice to know there's someone still awesome in the 2000's. My only question is: Where the hell are they!?!?! We need another American Idiot more than ever!

PS: Yes, I know a majority of this is from Wikipedia, and what is my own writing is shitty, but when you got only 1 lunch period to write something up, beggars can't be choosers.

Back From The Dead

WE ARE BACK. Well, I am. School's been an absolute nightmare, and I've been having issues in the family, but the important thing is, I AM BACK! Expect my first music review and videos very, very soon...ish.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Top 5 Timewasters

This was originally gonna be Top 10 Timewasters, but I wanted to be a little less predictable.
5. Forums
4. Reading books i've read 10,000 times
3. Going to the library and not getting books
2. The internet
1. MINECRAFT!

Friday, May 6, 2011

10 things I'm obsessing over

10. Portal 2
9. Trying to be funny
8. Kingdom Hearts
7. Soul Eater
6.My MP3 player
5. Top 10 Lists
4. Finding a way to get more people to read this stuff
3. The possibility that I may be paranoid.
2. Watching CSI, the Big Bang Theory, and Criminal Minds
1. Waiting for the next season of Flashpoint (SWAT team drama ftw!)

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Retro Game of May: Earthbound

OK, so Earthbound, aka Mother 2, aka the only Mother game to get released in the USA officially, rules. I'm not gonna spoil the plot, but Earthbound is a tour de force RPG that unlike most RPGs, is set in the modern-ish world of the 1990's. You don't use swords and shields, you use yoyos, baseball bats, and frying pans. You fight an Eldritch Abomination so powerful went batshit insane and had it's IQ cut down to that of an infant....an infant capable of leveling Mount Olympus, bear in mind. It's Cthulhu meets Charlie Brown! You insta-win against weak enemies below your level (a feature I've only seen in Persona 4). You have psychic powers! If you aren't convinced to find an emulator and a ROM of this game, then you must hate video games.
I do have some issues with Earthbound: contrary to popular belief, I found the game a bit difficult. I often ran out of PP (the points you need to use your psychic powers), and had no way to restore except by slogging my ass way back to the hero's house to heal up.  Also, there's a status affect called 'mushroomized' that screws with your directional controls, and you have to find a certain NPC or try to stumble your way to a hospital to get healed. (Good luck with that, pal!) No anti-fungal potion for you, numbnuts!
Finally, you can get your ass kicked into the next galaxy. Repeatedly. It's humilating to say i got my ass handed to me repeatedly by a Black Ant, an Attack Slug, a Feral Dog, and a Rowdy Mouse. I feel like someone revoked my Man-Card. But the game makes up for it with it's humor, wit, and pacing.  Now, could Nintendo please put Earthbound and Mother 3 on the Wii Virtual Console?

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

10 Things I Hate

10. People who immediately think reading manga makes you a weeaboo/japanophile
Thanks for making me feel like I have a dirty secret, you bunch of ballturds.
9. Fire drills
Aaaah my ears!!!!!!
8. Divorced parents
IT'S TEARING ME APART!!!!!!
7. Hipsters
AKA losers- than again, I have a profound love for the music of OK Go, so I could be making myself a hypocrite.
6. Modern pop music
Oh, how Americans are easily amused! With the exception of OK Go, modern popular artists have nothing to offer.
5. Bullies.
I'm gonna be serious here, let me just say: if you are being bullied, I beg of you, TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT IT. It is not your fault you're being bullied, bullies are just insecure jerkwads. On another note, if you are the bully, I highly suggest you re-evaluate your life....you turd.
4. Cosplayers
Dressing up as anime characters is the reason why item number 10 exists.
3. Geometry
I want to be a game designer, when the hell am I gonna use this crap!?!?
2. Parents getting remarried
So...much...STRRREEEEESSSSSSSSS......
1. The thought I might not be funny.
Oh god, I'm terrified by this thought.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Upcoming posts for May

This month, I will bringing you:
10 Things I hate
Retro Game of the Month
and a possible video version of the Soul Eater review

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Soul Eater Review: Criticisms

Now, overall, Soul Eater is a great series. It easily switches from action to comedy to drama and back to comedy without making the series feel like it's going through an identity crisis. My only complaint is that, while the manga is still bing continued, the anime's concluded. When have a series this good, you don't end it until the fandom says "Ok, we're done here!" Also, when Asura gets resurrected, the series goes through a gritty reboot. This would be fine if the series had a 5 month hiatus, but instead, it reboots only a third of the way through the series. I couldn't help but go "Huh? What? What the fruitcake is going on----HOLY F****** SHINIGAMI ON A POGO STICK AAAAAAHHHH THIS IS GETTING SCARY!!!!!"
You may ask "Cameron, you lovable jerk, your points are perfectly valid, but what's your opinion?" My opinion of Soul Eater is this: it's not the next Fullmetal Alchemist as many people are saying, but it may be the next Bleach or D. Gray Man. I unabashedly love Soul Eater like Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw loves Portal. Now, can someone kindly have Tim Burton make a film adaptation and have him cast Johnny Depp as Dr. Stein? Please?

Soul Eater Review, Part 4: Plot Synopsis

Copy-pasted from Wikipedia, then edited by me to give it my awesome humor.
In Soul Eater, Maka and Soul Eater are students at Death Weapon Meister Academy, (aka DWMA, aka Shibusen) as well as Black * Star, Tsubaki, Kid, Liz, and Patty.  Shortly after the start of Soul Eater, Maka and Soul Eater face off against Medusa, who forces Crona and Ragnarok to fight Maka. Later on, Medusa and her cohorts attack DWMA with the intention of reviving Cthu- uhm, I mean Asura!!!! (damn, i got stop doing that). Despite the combined efforts of Maka, Black Star, and Death the Kid, Medusa's group successfully revives Asura, upon which the series, which before hand was cruising down Awesome Street, decided to stop at the nearest Nightmare Fuel Station. Medusa is seemingly killed by Stein, while Crona surrenders to DWMA and goes on to enroll there and befriend Maka.
As a result of Asura's spreading madness, Medusa's older sister  Arachne comes out of hiding after 800 years. Arachne reforms her organization Arachnophobia, which poses itself as a serious threat to DWMA. Shinigami calls in death scythes from around the world to aid in the fight against Arachnophobia. During this time, Medusa resurfaces with her soul in the body of a young girl, and forms a truce with DWMA so they can annihilate the threat of Arachnophobia together. The DWMA students and Medusa's entourage infiltrate Arachnophobia's headquarters where Maka defeats Arachne, only for Medusa to betray DWMA, possessing Arachne's body and brainwashing Crona into rejoining her. Meanwhile, Death the Kid is captured by Noah, an enemy posing as the former meister 'Eibon'. Following this, Maka finally succeeds in turning Soul Eater into a death scythe. The duo become part of the newly formed meister unit Spartoi, which successfully manages to rescue Death the Kid and take down Noah.

Soul Eater Review Pt. 3: The Villains

OK, time to look at what makes a manga: it's villains.
First, we have Crona and the Demon Sword, Ragnarok.

Crona is  memorable because he/she (Crona's gender is pretty ambiguous) because A) she/he is always saying he/she "doesn't know how to deal" with most things, and B) THE BLACK BLOOD. AUUUGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!
Let me explain what the Black Blood is: the Black Blood is like normal blood, only black....if normal blood drove people who had it TOTALLY BATSHIT INSANE. 
Ragnarok is a jerk. He has a symbiotic relationship with Crona (he is where the black blood comes from) and, when summoned.....bursts out of Crona's back. Euurrghhhhh.....squick, indeed. Even worse? Ragnarok can WEAPONIZE Crona's black blood, turning it into needles, spikes, flying razors, etc. Yikes.


Next, we have Medusa.

 Now a lot of people are scared witless of Medusa, who is a witch with a snake motif masquerading as a school nurse. I, however, find Medusa to be the 3rd best character in the series. Yes, she's scary, but she's also rather attractive (Spirit is a bit disappointed when he finds out she's a witch. Not angry. DISAPPOINTED.Of course, this is Spirit we're talking about....)


The one villain that scares me the most is Cthulhu- uhm.. I mean, Asura!!!!
He gets introduced, and the series stops being the dream of Tim Burton and becomes the nightmare of H.P. Lovecraft. Just look at the first time we see his face....
OH GOD MAKE IT STOP AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And if the picture isn't enough to make you need to change your pants, read Wikipedia's description of him:
The first kishin or demon god, and the ultimate antagonist in the series. He is known for his exceedingly paranoid disposition and quirky habits such as wrapping his entire head with countless scarfs and wearing five or six layers of clothes. He was fearful of everything, including his weapon partner Vajra, whom he devoured whole, though he can still cough up Vajra to attack. The scarfs on his body are actually made from his own overstretched skin, and can also be used as weapons. As the embodiment of madness, Asura emits a wavelength that causes people to lose their grip on reality and hallucinate. He was one of Shingami's strongest subordinates 800 years prior to the start of the series. Out of fear he began devouring innocent souls, including his own weapon partner; Lord Death ripped off his skin and used it as a bag to imprison him beneath Death City. He is eventually released thanks to Medusa and her minions, and goes off into hiding to spread his madness across the world. He is rarely seen in the manga though he does become the center of focus for the anime, particularly Arachne's plans to spread his madness across the world.

Arachne
is Medusa's older sister, a witch with a spider motif who loves to mess with your mind....
Wikipedia says: She was defeated by Shinigami 800 years prior, which causes her to seal her soul into a golem until she could revive herself. She does not get along with her sister, and prefers to manipulate the enemy from afar rather than face them in direct combat. She is able to immobilize enemies with spider silk imprison someone within their own mind and force them to face their own fears, and use a number of spiders for reconnaissance...yikes.....

But no character can match Asura in his sheer nightmare-fuel potential.........
AAAGGGHHHH!!! BE GONE DEMON, AND LEAVE ME BEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Soul Eater Review Part 2: Minor Characters

First we have the Grim Reaper himself, Shinigami, aka Lord Death who looks like, well, erm....
....there's actually a canonical reason why he looks like that...it's so he doesn't scare the living shit outta the younger students...


Next, we have  Dr. Franken Stein. Yeah, you can groan now, but Stein is actually my second favorite character, because of how badass he is. He's a bit crazy....actually, that would be an understatement. He is the MOST PSYCHOTIC good guy in the series. He just looooooves to dissect things....including himself. Just look at him!


You see that thing sticking outta his head? That's a SCREW. He's LITERALLY GOT A SCREW LOOSE.



Next we have Spirit Albarn
 Maka's dad and a Death Scythe. Currently divorced, because he's a, well, a bit of a player.... Maka despises him, but Spirit really wants to be a good father to MAka, which kinda makes up for him being a flirt.

Finally, we have Excalibur,

the legendary holy sword who has a bigger ego than Black * Star (FOR THE THIRD TIME, NOT THAT KIND OF EGO!!!!!!), and is so irritating and self-centered that just saying his name in front of someone who's met him will elicit a very special grimace from the unlucky character....

That face just says: DO NOT WANT!!!!! That's it for the minor characters, onto the (cue lightning flash and dramatic organ music) THE VILLAINS.

Soul Eater Review Part 1: The Main Characters & Synopsis

OK, so I intended to do this review muc later, but because I'm impatient, I just said "Oh, screw patience, let's do this thing!".  First, let's examine the setting: Soul Eater is set in the town of Death City, which looks like a city designed by Tim Burton. (To be honest, you'll be hearing me mention Mr. Burton A LOT in this review.)  The whole town looks like a Xerox of Halloweentown from Nightmare Before Christmas, and has
bizarre architecture: the school has giant candles sticking out of the walls!!!
I  feel like copy-pasting the basic synopsis from Wikipedia now, so.... INCOMING COPYPASTE!!!!!!!
The series revolves around three teams consisting of a weapon meister and (at least one) human weapon. Trying to make the weapon a "Death Scythe" and thus fit for use by the academy's headmaster, Shinigami (better known as Death), they must collect the souls of 99 evil humans and one witch, in that order; otherwise, they will have to restart all over again. Now, you may think "Oh, it's a monster of the week/collection manga", but it's not


Now, we get to the fun stuff! It's time to meet the main characters!
First we have Team 1: Maka Albarn and Soul Eater

 Quite honestly, Maka can tell Sakura to suck it. Maka is partnered up with the cool slacker Demon Scythe, Soul Eater Evans. Maka is a hard worker and very intelligent, with a bit of a temper.

(The Maka Chop  looks painful) Soul on the other hand, is, as I said before, is a slacker badass who is also an excellent pianist.

Now, we have team 2: Black * Star and Tsubaki.

 Black * Star (Yes, that's how his name is written) is a supposedly incredible assassin, but we never see that- this guy has NO INSIDE VOICE AND IS ALWAYS TALKING REALLY REALLY REALLY LOUD EVEN WHEN HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE STEALTHY. Plus, he has an ego even bigger than mine (No, not like that, you sick perv). Now you may be saying "Hey, wait a second this Black * Star kid sounds really similar to Narut-...." Let me just cut you off right there and tell you NO HE IS NOTHING LIKE THAT DUMBASS LOSER. Black * Star's fail moments are genuinely funny, and he can be a real badass when he needs to be. Partnered up with Black * Star is the Shadow Weapon, Tsubaki, capable of becoming a knife, a pair of chain scythes, a smoke bomb, a giant shuriken, and later on, a katana. Now, I really feel bad for Tsubaki, she puts up with Black * Star's ego (again, not that kind of ego, now get your mind out of the gutters, dammit!) with a smile. I'm pretty sure that deep down, she just wants to beat the ever-lovin' crap outta Black * Star.
Finally, we have the third and final team of Death The Kid, and the Thompson sisters, Liz and Patty.

Now, let me tell you, Kid is one of my favorite Soul Eater characters, because he's the most OCD character since Adrian Monk. He's the son of Shinigami, and he is completely obsessed with symmetry. He'll have a panic attack if he thinks the painting in his living room is leaning even the slightest bit to the right, he will destroy any bad guy who isn't symmetrical, but will refuse to fight anyone who is symmetrical. Even funnier is the fact that his hair has three white stripes on one side and no stripes on the other. Point this out to him, and he will get extremely depressed and self-loathing, upon which, Liz and Patty, Kid's twin pistols, will have to snap him out of his asymmetrical depression. Now, Kid is one of THE most AWESOME characters. Why? He's got some genuinely funny moments, he's the son of the GRIM REAPER, and when he fights, he dual wields pistols. Holding them barrel-side down. And pulling the triggers with his PINKY FINGERS. Do you know how DIFFFICULT THAT IS??? Even more impressive is the fact is that he isn't shooting bulltes- he's shooting COMPRESSED ENERGY FROM HIS SOUL.
Now, on to the minor characters....

Welcome

Welcome To The Greatest Critical Blog This Side of the Internet!
My name is Cameron, but you may call me "Your Greatness". If you have came here because your friend suggested it, then your friends have good taste. If you came here because you think this blog is gonna suck, go sit in that corner over there and think about where your life went wrong. Anyway, you may be thinking "Cameron, you suave psychopath, what could you possibly be reviewing? My answer is ANYTHING. Manga, anime, video games, books, TV, movies, real life, etc., etc., etc. I will tell you about the biggest fails, the greatest triumphs, and the diamonds in the rough. And YOU have to deal with my sharp wit and sarcasm (Muahahahahahahahaaaa.....) This week, I will be reviewing the manga/anime juggenaut of awesome badass hilarity and action known as Soul Eater.